Making friends with ADHD/ADD

My two grown sons are starting to poke fun at me for going back to grab and post my really oooold pictures. It’s all good: laughter is good medicine! This is a rare and important one, though–showing the results of the generous and compassionate risk my father took, trumping my mom’s veto and letting me have a horse. (He even supported me when I wanted to let my dear friend, Fancy, have her own baby!) This was the breakthrough period of my teens–braces and all–that provided my first touchstone: the magical essence of what science now calls attachment.

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My mom was-as some people tried to couch for my sake-something else. She was anxiety piled atop anxiety, and I was buried under that heap of muck. (For non-horse people–you muck-out horse stalls every morning and then give them a fresh supply of bedding straw.) To this day, the smell of horse **** is like perfume to me. Weird, eh?  Continue reading “Making friends with ADHD/ADD”

There’s a Full Moon Tonight!

via Daily Prompt: Moon

I could use a little (okay, maybe a LOT) of help from some of you bloggers who have incredible photography skills. Until that happens, all I can offer you is my message. You see, as a former (20 years!) classroom teacher, full moons retain their residual uh oh effect on me. When kiddos were at their worst, we had to be at our best. That is when we, figuratively speaking, felt like getting out our stop signs and fire hoses. Yes, there are times when teachers and parents inadvertently jump over their little moons, and maybe even block their moons–robbing them of the lights they were so naturally shining. If so, those teachers and parents just didn’t happen to know that there was a better way.

With new, better-informed, and improved classroom management training, schools are making a turn in the right direction.  Unfortunately, schools are still at a loss to help children or parents before they set foot in a classroom. The first five years make all the difference in the world.

When we hear about politically oppressive regimes that use torture, imprisonment, and solitary confinement, we think brainwashing, PTSD, cruel and inhumane treatment. We don’t think of it as anything close to something like punishing children, ignoring them, teasing them, or shouting at them in anger. And yet, for those tiny little people at the hands of giant adults, it can feel exactly the same. The fear factor is no different. The result empties them of their very selves. Their little lights can just go dark. I know. It happened to me. I also now know that I have plenty of company. Our world struggles every day with issues of sadness, anxiety, fear, loneliness, anger, and depression.

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Love is the simple solution. Understanding and knowing how to communicate love is…you know…complicated.   Continue reading “There’s a Full Moon Tonight!”

Oops, I forgot to eat

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I hyper-focus. Sometimes hyper-focus is my salvation (e.g. deadlines). Other times it is…not so healthy. When I’m in my zone, the dryer buzzes, the dog scratches at the door, I need to go to the bathroom, but my head is oblivious to all.

Today, I forgot to eat. I looked up. I fumbled for my watch—ugh—it needs a new battery. Looked at the clock on the wall. (I have a clock on just about every wall in the house.) It was way past lunch time, and I was almost too weak to make myself food.

Tomorrow…maybe I will hyper-focus on food. And the dog will still be scratching at the back door.